One of the most important goals in life is how to smooth out the ride, or as stated above, learning “shave off the sharp edges”.
An essential clue we get, over and over again, is that we tend to experience what we put out there. If we are in a positive and receptive state, we experience more of those qualities. Likewise, if we tend be negative and to treat people poorly, we find that we receive our share of those same experiences.
The challenge is being aware and believing that our behavior really does result in these conditions. What happens to us is just not the way it is, written in stone. Rather, we have a co-creative role in what we bring to it.
Years ago some of us were enrolled in a course called “The Academy” in Hawaii being offered by Trin Hunt, an established educator. Her course was several months long and we met for one weekend a month to practice numerous ideas, which we perhaps had not thought about. There were tests, readings, exercises, and a host of ideas presented for our consideration.
One of these ideas was to stop swearing and complaining for twenty-one days. The idea was to see what would happen in our lives as a result of this simple concept. It didn’t require that we change our beliefs in anything. Just stop a rather mindless habit by catching ourselves and consciously stopping.
After three weeks I found that I was simply experiencing a more agreeable world. Not that there were no challenges, but there was a noticeable difference. Because I was aware of this exercise, I was able to connect the dots and realize this was a useful tool to carry with me.
It also caused me to examine the whole idea of what we have to say about people and events around us. I realized that for part of my life I found that every once in a while I would make a snide remark or say something to put someone in their place. I might have felt clever for a moment, but at the end of the day I had left someone feeling poorly about me and perhaps themselves and for what good reason? None. I had satisfied my ego at someone else’s expense.
Once I started asking myself, “What are the intended results of what I am about to say to, or about, someone?” I could detach and evaluate the answer. I was becoming more mindful about what I was doing and what I might expect.
As I began to act in this manner, I experienced noticeable improvements. Not huge, but noticeable. I realized that just these small acts were making life more enjoyable. I became aware that I was consciously eliminating harmful actions that when sent into the universe would return to me at sometime, making life as disagreeable for me as I had probably made for someone else.
I guess you could say I was smoothing out the sharp edges and creating a bit more joy in my life. I pass this on only as an observation but one I found to be worthwhile. Give it a try if you haven’t already, and see what happens. Perhaps a new door will open in your life, and you will step into a place that brings more contentment and peace.
Sanderson Sims, July 2019